Today you read the "Belonging" in class. Please answer the following questions:
How important is it to you to "look right?" To "act right?" To "fit in?" How do you feel when you don't belong? How does it affect your self-esteem? When in a child's development is he or she most vulnerable to issues related to "in" and "out" group behavior? Are adolescents more or less vulnerable than young children? Would you have joined the Hitler Youth if you lived in Germany at the time? Why or why not?
18 comments:
in my veiw of life i dont worry to much about if i look right as an example of this everyday i dont care if i had a small food stain on my everyday clothes while if i was wearing a suit and got a stain on that then i would worry also i naver act right i always act the way i naturaly am instead of what people whant me to act and when i used to be bullied in mill pond i always felt sad and incapebel of doing anything. i do think that children are most vanerable when they are very young from 2 to teens because thats when there starting to structure themselves and adolesnets are more vunerable thean kids because they already know whats right and wrong so when they go into a new enviroment where they are in diffrent group enviroments it makes it hard for them to change who they are and how they act to fit in. also if i was at that time of the hitler youth groupe i would most likley be the last kid to join because i would think of what will happen if i became a part of this but i would still join so people whont bullie me etc. that is my opinion on this.
It is more important than I would like to admit to “fit in,” in the general sense. The sense of belonging or not can change a person’s life greatly. It feels plain old awkward when you don’t fit in somewhere. Its not that it hurts my self-esteem, but it certainly plays on my self-confidence. I people are the most vulnerable to issues related with “fitting in” their entire childhood. Children can be cruel, and it is widely accepted as being a big part of adolescent life. To me at least, one of the marks of adulthood is being at peace with one’s self which means that social pressures are not as overbearing on one’s life. That is not to say however that social pressures are not always around. My blood would have prevented me from joining the Hitler Youth.
Sanjiv Banavali
I can careless about my physical appearance, looking right and fitting in. What I really care about is how I act and I am always striving to be a kind person with good manners. When I feel I don't belong it does feel a bit awkward and strange and it doesn't have too much of an impact on my self-esteem but I do lose a little bit of confidence. Also, it's a good feeling to know that you fit in somewhere because you know that you have friends that you can count on when you need them. I do think that when a child is developing they are more vulnerable to issues related to "in" and "out" groups. I also think that children are more vulnerable than adolescents because mentally children are still developing and trying to figure themselves out, while adolescents have a little bit of an idea of who they are.
I probably would've joined Hitler Youth if I lived in Germany at that time because thousands and thousands of children were part of the program and I would've been very intimidated and scared to be an outcast so I would join. Also, Hitler was such a great motivational speaker and he probably could've convinced every single young German child that Hitler Youth was the way to go.
I think that it is fairly important to look right. People in our society are generally ok if they look a little different but if they look significantly different they many be looked down on. Acting right I would say is very important. For most people fitting in is also very important. It is very uncomfortable when you do not fit in with people, it really makes you feel very bad about yourself. I think that it starts when children are young but final decisions, the ones that stick with you forever seems to happen in adolescents, when people seem the most judgmental. I think I would have joined the Hitler Youth because what was being told to them was just so convincing. And all the people I know would be joining and I would not want to be left out.
Absent
It definitly is important for me to look right and act right and to fit in, however i feel as if the friends i have now generally accept me for who i am and that's the most important requirement personally for me. When your friends accept you for who you are it's easy to look right and act right and to feel fit in. When i don't belong i feel unworthy and sad, it lowers my self-esteem. Right when school starts a child's development can be most vulenrable to issues related in being in or out of the goup. Kids at such a young age judge and pick on those who seem less worthy towards them. Due to the fear in my life i might've joined the Hitler Youth, however i'm not entirely sure to be honest.
I think that personally, the only people's opinion that really matter to me are my close friends and two brothers. But if i dont agree with what my friends says I will let them know with no hesitation. I think, like Sanjiv said, you have to look yourself in the eye and say am I a good person. Other than that, I do not really care what people think of me. I admit that I do like to be accepted by people but, I like to also be different. I have also never really struggled with acceptance in my life and that probably sounds arrogant but, I have been close with the same friends my whole life. Its hard for a lot of kids in high school however, to deal with acceptance and fitting in. its very easy for teenagers to jerks to kids who do not neccessarily fit in and for those people I feel sorry. At the time, I must admit that I probably would have joined the Hitler Youth. I feel as though none of those children really knew what they were getting themselves into and it just seemed like the hot thing to do.
For me, I believe fitting in is just a defense mechanism. With maturity the need to fit in leaves. I think it is more important to be yourself, whether or not that is accepted. For children it is harder to see this because they are more influenced by their friends and surroundings, and this is due to their lower level of maturity.
If i was faced with the decision to join the Hitler Youth i would like to say that i would decline. but Knowing the ages of the children that are recruited and all the influences on children with such a low maturity leve. I believe that it may be very difficult to decline that offer.
I think that I like to "look right" and "fit in" the majority of the time, but I do it so that I feel comfortable that way- not necessarily because I care about what people think of me. Like Tom said, I think it's more about doing the right thing in your actions. If I don't belong, I agree with Jon in that my self-confidence is lowered and I feel awkward and out of place. I think that feeling a sense of belonging is much more of an issue throughout childhood and early teen years, but then it comes down to how comfortable a person is with their self and their surroundings. I'm not sure if I would've joined- it depends how old I was at the time. I definitely would've joined it as a kid, but I think after age 14 or so I became way less easily influenced.
i agree with tom's views on "belonging". I am happy with who i am and how different i am from others, however i do think that a big part of highschool is fitting in, especially at a young age. it is no surprise that Hitler targeted youth as his followers. many at that age are very naive, and more willing to follow what is the norm instead of standing out. Adults played an important role in making the hitler youth stronger. the story about Elizabeth Dopazo mentioned that she and her brother were too afraid of the teachers and the punishment that came with telling them their beleifs to stand up for themselves. I have heard from many doctors, psychologists, and regular adults that most people mature and make better decisions in their late twenties. Therefore i believe that young children and adults are just as vulnerable to following propaganda. Honestly, i would have done what Elizabeth Dopazo did, and faked being part of the hitler youth if it meant protecting what is left of my family.
Personally, I feel that fitting in is a matter of one's own personal, unique personality and how it is compatible with another personality. When you know the two click, you have a true friend, and fitting in will come naturally, and this has been the majority of my experiences in high school. I do believe it is important to fit in, as it is important to me, because fitting in with a particular group that one can click with helps build a sense of identity. It is certainly, and accepted part of adolescent life that some children may be cruel to you, as Jon says, but this is all a part of life, as a person is traditionally a product of their environment.
I would have most likely joined the Hitler youth if I lived in Germany during that era, however I would be doing so as a naive, uninformed child.
absent.
I personally look similar to a lot of my friends in terms of how we dress and everything. I guess it is to fit in which is somewhat important. No one likes to be picked on or left out. For a lot of people like me it affects your self esteem a lot especially in a negative way. I think when a child is developing they are greatly effected physiologically effected by being in or out of a group. Obviously at this present time I would like to think I would never join the Hitler youth, but if I was a young German girl in Germany at the time I think being in or out of the group and being picked on an tormented by adults and peers like the children where in the packet I may have been influenced to join.
Haemin, I also agree that it is really important to fit in and feel like you belong and often this can be viewed as a weakness and lead to bad things...like the Hitler Youth being so successful.
personally, I don't care much for fitting in or buying into the standards that have been collectively agreed upon as the "right" way to look or act by the greater society and the micro-society within Westborough High School. I don't think there are appropriate ways to act, for example, but even that is completely subjective and open to personal interpretation; Overall, I think that natural human behavior and emoitons are greatly stifled by the judgment of others, rather than the freedoms experimented with by some social movements of the ninteen sixties. Sometimes I feel apart from a group, and it is trying, but I only allow my self-esteem to be determined by myself, and it really no longer concerns me if people think that say or do the things that I impulsively feel like doing. I definitely think that children are most aware of social groupings and distinctions when they are teenagers, though problems with feeling comfortable with oneself are present in adults, and even young children. I think children are less perceptive of the opinions of others and tend to be less judgmental, but environment is often the ultimate determining factor in these cases. Had I been a youth during the rise of the Nazi Party, I think it would have been very hard indeed to not accept the information and tasks that the government fed its people, specifically aimed at the children, because children have no basis for viewing and acting in hte world other than what their parents, teachers, or other sources of information give them. Children are unable to perceive their world and their surroundings, and they require an aid to explain things to them and acquaint them with the ways of the world; parents, primarily, and then also teachers, loder children, and other figures of authority in the children's eyes are experienced and wise, and thus must know the truth about the world and are the main sources of information that children can access. Germans in their late teens and older would be able to perhaps better comprehend their situation and have the ability to access information and form their own opinions, but children have neither that ability nor experience to make such decisions.
I feel like I want to try to fit in but at the same time I really don't care because I have some great friends who like and accept me for who I am. So I don't believe in changing oneself to "fit in"
I like to fit in just because it can feel wierd when you dont fit in. For me not fitting in doesnt hurt my self esteem but like Jon and Sanjiv said it does lower your confidence a little. I think that a child is vulnerable as soon as they enter school because they may not fit in and be made fun of. I wouldve thought about joining the hitler youth to look like I belong but being Jewish I have a feeling they wouldnt accept me.
When I first started school, it did not matter to me what other people thought about me. Eventually that carefree attitude caught up to me and I began to get teased. Part of the teasing was my fault as I was behaving in a disturbing manner. But most of the teasing was because of me being me and doing what came naturally to me. Now because of the teasing and ridiculing, I act in such a way so that everything I do is politically correct. To answer Mr. Gallagher's question, it is very important to me to "look right" and to "act right". I tend to feel very uncomfortable when I do not fit in because it is almost as if I am able to feel the stares of people looking at me. I become very self conscious about myself. I would find that a child is most subject to ridicule when he/she is in the middle school. I cannot say with a full certainty that I would not have joined the Hitler youth group but I will say that I would not now.
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